


if you were my cat...

by squidgirlfriends



Category: Splatoon
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff and Angst, dumb squirrel tangents, lots of shenanigans, oh?? also angst, pudding-related mishaps, silly things, warm your hands before cuddling with your gf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-10
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-06-25 11:21:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15639702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squidgirlfriends/pseuds/squidgirlfriends
Summary: That night was quieter than most, being back in Pearl’s old apartment while the workers fixed Marina’s up; it was…damaged,by one of Pearl’s recent kitchen adventures. Pearl’s old place was dusty and a bit empty (since she took most of her stuff with her back to the mansion,) but the occasional forgotten cd, or random discarded collectible figure reminded Marina that Pearl left a part of herself everywhere she’d ever been.(a collection of responses from atumblr sentence-starter prompt, called "shit i've said to my cat")





	1. "those squirrels look like they're doing something shifty..."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sure enough, three squirrels formed a sort of assembly line along the branch, hoarding something and passing it along to another squirrel, who was situated in the hollow. 
> 
> “Oh shit…” Pearl muttered.
> 
> “What, did you think I was _lying?”_ Marina whispered harshly. 
> 
> “Well, when you get my attention by saying something like _‘there are squirrels,’_ I’m not gonna take you very seriously.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this while listening to game grumps play pt so. two conflicting moods happening .. haha.. yeah.. i was embarrassingly close to pissing my pants.
> 
> enjoy!

“Marina. Stop staring out the window.”

“Can’t, there are squirrels.” 

Pearl slowly put her phone down, sitting up. Her lip curled up into a smirk as she peered over to the window, where Marina was determinedly staring out into the tree branches. 

“Squirrels? Mar, you  _have_  seen what a squirrel looks like, right?”

“Shut up, they’re doing something shifty,” Marina reached back and waved her hand around, motioning for Pearl to come look. She rolled her eyes, sliding out of bed and crawling up next to Marina at the windowsill. “See?” she pointed up to one of the branches, connected to the tree just beneath a hollow in the trunk.

Sure enough, three squirrels formed a sort of assembly line along the branch, hoarding something and passing it along to another squirrel, who was situated in the hollow. 

“Oh shit…” Pearl muttered.

“What, did you think I was  _lying_?” Marina whispered harshly. 

“Well, when you get my attention by saying something like ‘ _there are squirrels_ ,’ I’m not gonna take you very seriously.” 

“It’s not like squirrels are endangered, Pearl.”

“That’s not what I– you know what? Nevermind.” Pearl squinted up at the squirrels. “What do you think they’re  _doing_?” 

“It looks like they’re smuggling something…”

Pearl laughed. “Squirrel mafia… dealing illegal squirrel drugs…”

Marina giggled. “Do you think they smoke?”

“Tiny squirrel cigars,” Pearl spaced her thumb and index finger apart. “Tiny… tiny squirrel cigs.”

Marina’s giggling lifted into laughter, and she looked away from the squirrels.

“ _’Ey, bring the acorns, would’ja? Ya know, the illegal drugged acorns,_ ” Pearl made her voice low and scratchy.

Marina laughed harder, starting to double over. 

“ _Bring the squigars, would’je? Eh, eh._ ” 

“Squ-” Marina wheezed. “ _Squigars_?”

Now Pearl was laughing. “Y- yeah, squigars! For squids,  _and_  squirrels.” 

Marina nearly fell over laughing, tears forming in her eyes. For a moment, the mafia squirrels were forgotten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is dumb, i love them :’D


	2. "don't eat that!"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pearl thought for a moment. “Well, it was right after we released Acid Hues, so… when we hired our agent, and the big-deal record labels first started calling, and… how long ago was that again?”
> 
> “Almost a year, Pearl.” Marina smiled. “All the food in this fridge, including that pudding, has been there for almost a year.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> editing is for cowards, i was half asleep and listening to old vocaloid songs when i wrote this
> 
> anyways, here's this... lmao

“What are you  _doing?_ ” Marina slapped Pearl’s hand away and closed the fridge door.

“Wh- there was pudding in there!” Pearl put her hands on her hips and frowned. “What, you against pudding now?” 

Marina gave Pearl a long, hard look. “Pearl?”

“Yeah?”

“When was the last time we were actually  _living_  in this apartment?” 

Pearl thought for a moment. “Well, it was right after we released Acid Hues, so… when we hired our agent, and the big-deal record labels first started calling, and… how long ago was that again?”

“Almost a year, Pearl.” Marina smiled. “All the food in this fridge, including that pudding, has been there for almost a year.” 

“But s’not like we turned the power off when we weren’t here…” Pearl argued. “They put a bunch of gross chemicals in it anyway, to make it last forever!” 

Marina crossed her arms, eyebrows raised. 

Pearl groaned, long and tortured. “ _Fine_ , I won’t eat the pudding.” 

 

-

 

That night was quieter than most, being back in Pearl’s old apartment while the workers fixed Marina’s up; it was…  _damaged_ , by one of Pearl’s recent kitchen adventures. Pearl’s old place was dusty and a bit empty (since she took most of her stuff with her back to the mansion,) but the occasional forgotten cd, or random discarded collectible figure reminded Marina that Pearl left a part of herself everywhere she’d ever been. 

They had picked up a few things to eat from the store, and the smell of hot food was the only thing that overpowered the old apartment mustiness. 

Marina heard the fridge door open quietly, as if it was supposed to go unnoticed.  Marina smiled, rolling her eyes.

“Pearl?” she called.

“…yes?” 

“Put the pudding back.” 

“No!”

“Pearl.”

“No! I’m eating the pudding!” Pearl walked out from the kitchen proudly, with her nose in the air and a spoon in her hand. 

“Okay,” Marina nodded, looking back down at the old cd box she’d found on one of the mostly-empty bookshelves.

“Okay? That’s it? You’re not gonna lecture me?” 

“Nope,” Marina looked up, smiling sweetly. “But when you get sick, I claim all rights to say ‘I told you so.’“ 

“Fine! But,” Pearl ceremoniously ripped the pudding cup open. “I won’t get sick.” 

Marina stood up, kissing Pearl on the cheek. “We’ll see.” 

 

-

 

Halfway through movie night, Pearl abruptly stood and started towards the hallway.

“What’s wrong?” Marina sat up a little. 

“Nothing!” Pearl’s voice wobbled. “I am completely fine. Nothing pudding related-” a door–to the bathroom, presumably–slammed shut down the hall. 

“Remember to flush!” Marina smiled, adding under her breath: “ _I told you so…_ ” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> personally, i think marina is boss at the ‘disappointed mom’ look and can guilt trip even the coldest soul. (and… whatever Pearl’s soul is lmao) 
> 
> i added a few of my own personal hcs for them into this… ewe and i like my girls gay and mushy so ofc they dating at this point


	3. "don't be mean! I'm just trying to love you!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> s2g these keep getting sillier and sillier

“So, will you guys be okay sharing a bed in the hotel?” Marie asked, tapping away on her phone. “I mean, I didn’t think it would be much of a problem, but I figured I should at least ask fir–”

“Sure! Yeah, that’s–”  

“On! One condition…” Pearl deflated a little when Marina cut her off. “No cold fingers.” 

Marie frowned, confused, but Callie put a hand on her shoulder.

“Just, let them take care of it. I’ve learned not to question this kind of stuff from them, and soon you will too.” Callie reassured. 

“Look who’s miss know-it-all now, huh?” Marie smirked.

“What do you mean, cold fingers? Why is that the condition?” Pearl replied indignantly. 

“Because! Every time we cuddle in bed your fingers are like frozen sausages! It’s uncomfortable, and when you stick your hands under my shirt it’s not exactly like I’m expecting it always, so I’ll obviously make some kind of noise, and then you‘ll get angry because you get cranky when you’re low on sleep–”

“Wanna get something to eat?” Callie asked Marie. “They should be done when we get back.”

“Sounds good,” Marie turned to Off the Hook. “Alright, guys, we’re stepping out for a bit.”

“–and I could wake them up too!” Marina waved in the direction of Callie and Marie. “And then we’d all be tired and you’d be whiny because–”

“Alright, guys, see you around,” Marie chuckled, and they turned and left. 

“You’re so mean! My fingers aren’t like  _sausages_!” Pearl shoved her hands into Marina’s face. “Wanna feel ‘em now? How cold are they  _now_ , huh?  _Huh_?”

Marina slapped Pearl’s hands out of her face.”Well I don’t know about now, but those gloves smell  _awful_ , they need to be washed!”

“Oh, so now you’re saying I have sweaty hands? What, do you have a thing against sweaty cold hands?” 

“Yes!” 

“That’s mean! You’re mean! I just wanna cuddle with my weird girlfriend, is that so wrong?”

“It is when you have ice blocks for hands!”

“I’m just trying to love you!” Pearl shouted.

“Then at least hold something  _warm_  for once!” Marina shouted back. 

Pearl stalled in her retort. “Something… warm? What did you have in mind?”

Marina narrowed her eyes. “Hmm… well, a mug of tea, or a bowl of soup, or…”

“Or… word on the street is  _you_  got some warm hands i could hold…”

A blush colored Marina’s cheeks. She huffed a breath out her nose. “You suck.”

Pearl smirked. “Only when it matters…”

Marina nodded to the gloves. “Take them off.” Pearl complied, and Marina leaned over the table, resting on her elbows and taking both of Pearl’s hands into her own.

“Man, you got some… warm hands,” Pearl added smoothly. 

Marina smiled dryly. “Sometimes I wonder why I haven’t throttled you yet.”

“Because you love me?” Pearl batted her eyelashes. 

Marina rolled her eyes. “… I do.”

 

“You were right,” Marie elbowed Callie at the counter in the bakery, watching out the window. “They did sort it out…” 

“See what good happens when you listen to the master sensei?” Callie put a hand to her chest. 

“So humble,” Marie smirked. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writing callie and marie is fun, i dont do it as often as i should… 
> 
> check me out on [tumblr](https://squidgirlfriends.tumblr.com/)


	4. "i know that you're trying to tell me something, i just don't know what"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marina’s soft voice lilted down from the tree branches above Pearl’s head, and she looked up. Marina was perched on a high branch, her back against the thick trunk of the great tree. She wasn’t looking at Pearl. Her gaze was fastened to the sun, setting over the mountains, miles away. She was always miles away, even when she was sitting right across from Pearl. Marina wandered, and Pearl loved that. Loved watching her bare feet stir up the leaves and the flowers and the bushes and the bracken. 
> 
> “Come down here.” Pearl willed her voice not to break on her. 
> 
> When Marina finally looked over and met Pearl’s eyes, her gaze was vacant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh shoot!! this is kind of less direct, and more… UHHH (cough) SERIOUS, than the other ones I’ve written. what can I say, i wanted to break from the norm. im a rebel. enjoy!

“I know you’re here, Marina!” Pearl called out into the wilderness. Her weird hollow tree hut may be empty, but Pearl can still hear the bellfowers singing, so she knows the nymph hasn’t gone far. “You can’t just expect me to forgive you, you know! Running away won’t make me  _forget_ you!” She added, much quieter, “I _couldn’t_  forget…” 

“You’d be surprised,” Marina’s soft voice lilted down from the tree branches above Pearl’s head, and she looked up. Marina was perched on a high branch, her back against the thick trunk of the great tree. She wasn’t looking at Pearl. Her gaze was fastened to the sun, setting over the mountains, miles away. She was always miles away, even when she was sitting right across from Pearl. Marina wandered, and Pearl loved that. Loved watching her bare feet stir up the leaves and the flowers and the bushes and the bracken. 

“Come down here.” Pearl willed her voice not to break on her. 

When Marina finally looked over and met Pearl’s eyes, her gaze was vacant. 

“You can’t ignore me forever. You said it yourself, I’m a st–”

“Stubborn bastard, yeah,” Marina smiled without amusement. Vacant, empty. Pearl’s stomach turned sour. She  _hated_  it. Marina slid off the tree branch, her light white dress billowing around her like a flower bud before she touched the ground. 

“Grand entrance?”

“As always,” Marina mocked a curtsy, her smile gaining a little truth. As she met Pearl’s gaze again, though, she turned away. 

“There it is again. Can you  _stop_  that?” 

“Stop what?” Marina sat down at the edge of the stream, picking up a rounded pebble and absentmindedly moving it between her fingers. 

“You’re cutting me out, Marina.”

“I’m not–”

“ _Don’t._ ”

Marina sighed. “You don’t get it, Pearl. This was a mistake. You should’ve let me be when I left the smithy in town. Why can’t you just take a hint?” 

Hurt wilted the little bursts of hope in Pearl’s chest, melting them to cold dread. “ _Please_ , don’t use that card on me… what’s so wrong that I’ve done? Why don’t you want me around? Was I that bad to you? Because, you know, I thought for a little while that you might’ve even loved me a little–”

“I do love you, Pearl!” Marina cried, abruptly standing up. The emptiness in her eyes was completely drowned out by pleading hurt. The grass around her feet started to brown and wither. Clouds covered the sun.

“Then  _why_?” Pearl spat out. 

Marina shook her head, hiding her face in her hands. “I love you, and I don’t want anything to happen to you… please,” she whispered, “just go. _Please_.”

“What are you saying?” Pearl’s voice grew dangerously quiet. “Are you saying you think I need protection? You think I’m weak? Weren’t you the one telling me I was the strongest person you knew?”

“No, Pearl, I–”

“Because, out of all the fucking people close to me who don’t believe I can handle  _the hard stuff_ , I didn’t think you’d be one of them. I’m not your flower, Marina!”

The nymph’s eyes welled up with tears. “Pearl, please, you don’t  _understand_ –” 

“I don’t understand?” Pearl laughed incredulously. “You don’t understand anything!”

“Pearl–”

“No! You not once asked how I might’ve felt in this whole dumb thing, Marina, I miss you, why won’t you tell me why you’re pushing me away, this is so, so  _fucking dumb_!”

“ _Pearl,_ ” Marina sobbed. “ _You can’t–_ ”

“No! No! You– you’re being so damn _selfish_ , and to think, I was planning on asking you to run away with me,  _cod_ , I’m such a dumbass! How dumb does that sound, huh? You’re  _selfish_!” 

“You aren’t _listening to me_!” Marina screamed, thrusting her hand out and squeezing her fist. Suddenly, Pearl couldn’t  _breathe,_ it was like burning hot chains had come around her neck, choking her _._ Her hands flew up to her neck, and she gasped for air.

Marina made a pained sound, like an animal that’d been shot, and she forced herself to lower her hand, nearly falling backwards from the force of breaking the magic.

And Pearl could  _breathe_  again, she choked and gasped and fell to her knees, her eyes tearing up at the sudden dizziness. Sharp pains, like burns, still stabbed through her neck, like hot steel. 

“Pearl, I…” Marina could barely talk, her voice catching and breaking. “You can’t– could never be a part of my life. I’m  _sorry._ ” Darkness descended, and by the time it had dissipated, Marina was gone. 

Sunlight broke through the trees again. The stream glittered in the newfound light. Pearl struggled to her feet, and looked around. There was no hut. The bellflowers were gone. There was only an overgrown patch of bushes and bracken, by the stream. 

What the hell was  _that_? She had never been burned before. She was part  _fire mage_. A tear rolled down her cheek. 

As much as she hated to think it, Marina may have been right. Pearl didn’t listen. Pearl didn’t know her at all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i still don’t know if that follows the sentence starter… huh. well! if not, then enjoy this angst…. i hadnt realized how long i’d wanted to start writing this au for.. haha…


	5. "how can you be such a bed hog? you're so tiny!"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She rolled over (with much difficulty,) glaring at Pearl. The look, obviously, had no effect; Pearl was dead asleep. Her face was squished into the pillows, a line of drool running attractively from her mouth to the pillowcase, soaking into a small puddle. 
> 
>  
> 
> _Disgusting._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what can i say. im a mush ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> apologies if this is a little lazy…. i was an idiot and wrote this directly into the response post, and. i copied over it. so. i had to rewrite it all. nice…

“ _I can’t_ _believe_ _her,_ ” Marina muttered to herself, trying desperately to not slide off the edge of the bed. You’d think, someone so small couldn’t  _possibly_  take up all the space on such a huge bed. 

She rolled over (with much difficulty,) glaring at Pearl. The look, obviously, had no effect; Pearl was dead asleep. Her face was squished into the pillows, a line of drool running attractively from her mouth to the pillowcase, soaking into a small puddle. 

 _Disgusting_. 

Marina softened. Her glare had no intentions of being held, anyway. She reached out, smoothing out the little frowny wrinkle between Pearl’s eyebrows with the pad of her thumb. Pearl hummed sleepily, flopping over onto her side and twisting up the covers even more. 

Marina scooted up and cuddled against Pearl’s back, snaking her arms around her middle. Pearl stirred.

“ _Mmm…’rina…_ ” she muttered. 

“Hmm. How can you, the smallest inkling alive, take up literally all the space in this giant bed?” Marina whispered. Pearl huffed a half-conscious laugh, putting her hand over Marina’s, resting just over her stomach. 

“ _‘s.. a talent…_ ” Pearl’s voice was scratchy with sleep. Marina wanted to squeeze her sometimes, she was so cute. She’d never tell that to Pearl’s face, though. She wouldn’t want a brisk response and a sudden, intense pillow fight at one in the morning. (She’d learned enough from the first time.) 

Marina let her eyes fall shut, nuzzling the back of Pearl’s neck. If there was a limit to the warm feeling that blossomed throughout her entire body when they were together, she hadn’t reached it yet. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i keep adding chapters lmao, ppl keep rqing more...
> 
> check meowt on [the tumbly site](https://squidgirlfriends.tumblr.com/)
> 
> edit:THANKS FOR 69 KUDOS YO LMAO


End file.
